[C.Smith]

graymachine, on 09 February 2010 - 12:56 PM, said:

Much of this stems the "2009, The Year of the Suck" as I call it. But, simply knowing how far and how long things can swing into sucksville has really made me re-evaluate when I am going with this.

My original thought process about this started with me thinking about the fact that I now live in LA. I live in LA to be where the work is. I work here so I can pay the tremendous cost of living in LA, so I can be where the work is. So I can work and pay for LA. WTF is this crap?

I could be grateful to be working. But, I think the moment we settle for less than we want is the exact moment our precious time here on earth becomes a complete waste of time. We can do what is easy, or we can strive for what we want. I want to earn a living wage, take care of my family, and spend time with my family. I don't think that is too much to ask for. It's cool that I make shiny pixels for a living. But, it's not SO COOL that I'm going to do it 20 hours a day for the next 40 years. At least, in the freelance studio environment.

Jesus, Harry. You took every word out of my mouth. I'm turning 38 in a week and I have seriously reflected on my life lately. They aren't going to play my commercials at my funeral. When I'm sitting on my porch in the wee hours - if I make it that long - I'll want to know I spent every last second with my son, wife, and friends that I could. Work can be addicting when you're in the fog of collecting checks, but is it really worth the life you scrape away and will never , ever get back? Sometimes I think about just simplifying everything and being a technical director. Just sitting in a back room programming fun, helpful tools to whatever sucker hired me to sit there. Then go home at 5 and enjoy my life.

For you youngin's: Shit turns around hella quick. In your 20's life is always down the road. You're preparing. You hit thirty and feel okay that you JUST turned 30. A few years and what seems like just a few projects later you hit 35 and realize you aren't the kid preparing for life but heading quickly towards looking back at what you wish you still had. Then closing in on 40, you start breaking things down to the simplest terms like WTF am I preparing for? I should be enjoying every second that is slipping away.

Like when you're a kid and it's 3:30pm on Friday, you're euphoric thinking about what you're going to do that weekend. Even Saturday evening, you're still excited about the night. But then Sunday morning was just a blink away. Even though you still have a whole day and night before school, you start slowing down and getting a bit more serious about what you want to do that day. Between saturday night and sunday morning is around 37 years old to me. When you blink and go from looking forward to looking around.

[troyA]

Hey everyone,

I turned forty not so long ago, and have been doing this for half my life. And the stuff I did this last year was the best I've ever done.

Chris and Harry are absolutely right. And I'd like to brighten it up a bit. We love what we do, and should stop when we no longer have a passion for it. I suspect that most of us will continue to create long after we stopped getting those checks. I don't feel a need anymore to add that next big name, but I do feel a need to be better at this tomorrow than I was today.

Who says we have a shelf life? I'll keep going as long as I can.

[VelocityVideo]

Amen, Harry. I turned 40 last year and have two little boys. One just turned two in November, and his brother turned three in December. All I can think of most days is that at 4:30 (my boss lets me leave early every day to pick them up from the babysitter) I can go get 'em. We go to the airport and ride the escalators or watch jets fly over our heads at the end of the runway. Or we go to the top of the state capitol (North Dakota's tallest building) and I stand them on the window sills. Or we just go to the Caterpillar dealership and look at big machines and they tell me the names of all of them.

I didn't know anything about "motion graphics" until my escape from television in 2003. I've always had a passion for live TV, but in the early 90s I started thinking that I had better be able to actually produce something if I want to have a future past my twenties. I did work in Lightwave and Boris a bit, but most of my motion talents were still programming a DVE for live news and sports.

When I started working for a production company in 2003 and found mograph.net, I realized that I was sorely missing a design background, a foundation without which all those other mad skillz are limited. Thankfully osmosis had helped teach me some things about design, but I ain't no artist. I finally got my hands on After Effects, something the TV stations wouldn't buy, and the rest is history. I haven't done any work that would blow minds here on the board, but I'm doing work I'm happy with.

In the mean time, I've found a small company where there's no gossip or backstabbing, we grill out on Fridays quite often, and every client that comes on is like a new friend. My bosses (married couple) introduced me to the girl I eventually married, they were there for the birth of our boys, and they treat their employees like family. As I mentioned, they also do things like work around my need to pick up my little fellas on time at the end of the day. Those things can't be given a monetary value.

Live freelance production work up here is usually pretty hit and miss, especially now that the economy is bad elsewhere. North Dakota is the only state that doesn't have a recession, and we've actually got three quarters of a billion dollars in the state government's "rainy day" fund after passing tax cuts for personal income, businesses, and property tax levies last year. But since it's bad elsewhere, nobody wants to hire a truck and crew to come out here to do any television, assuming we've got a sporting event here worth televising regionally In the mean time, the television stations here don't pay much and the place I worked seems to change hands every couple of years. It turns out that the ideas I had for career preservation back in my early twenties were unusually prescient.

I wish you the best and lots of fun family time. Hopefully we'll still see some of your tutorials trickle out from time to time!

Cf

[mete_shop]

A lot of the bigger name shops make a killing by working freelancers to death. This is a separate but related issue. In New York and LA especially, you'll find a lot of places that expect you to stay for 12+ hours. A lot of my happiness comes from working at a place that, with the exception of deadline weeks, doesn't expect me to stay late every day and work on weekends.

I've never worked in LA, but I hear some pretty horrific stories about shops there. 20 hour days for extended periods is just unacceptable! Glad you found a convenient exit out, dude. But I wouldn't say the LA experience is indicative of every shop you'll ever freelance for.

[scott frizzle]

Harry, good for you for taking charge. You've done the right thing in deciding what makes you happy and making the necessary changes to get you there.

[NastyJames]

jayfaker, on 09 February 2010 - 01:57 PM, said:

Man, this thread is really bumming me out. Actually it's just reflecting the feelings I've been going through for the past year.

I turn 30 this year. I discovered After Effects, motion graphics and graphic design at the tail end of film school 4 years ago. Being a hack at motion graphics made it a lot easier to get a job in the local market than being a proficient editor. But I hate being a hack. The last four years I have been struggling like crazy to teach myself design, typography, and animation. I've been really struggling to push myself to learn to draw. My goal has been to get to a real shop and learn from real professionals.

And then it occurs to me: Am I working this hard to move from my well paying job as a hack into an entry level position at a real shop? Even if I became reasonably good, would I ever stand a chance against recent graduates (cheap, with no kids) who have been drawing and designing since college, let alone high school? Have I pigeon-holed myself into a mediocre job doing uninspired projects for clients who demand uninspired results, and all this because I decided to switch careers at the end of my education?

I could switch back to editing, but that would take me back to square one. I could work more towards a creative/directorial position (right?) but how to do that when their are no ladders to climb at my family-owned job where all the creative power is held by father/son. Are there any other options I should look into?

You give me hope, though, Harry. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. They are helping me to revisit my career goals with a better perspective on what is possible.

Hey man, I just read your post and I'll tell you it really got to me. I'm in the exact same boat. I just kind of fell into the motion thing, and have a well-paid position doing an uninspired job. I've got no professional training, hell I've never even worked alongside anybody who does any motion work. I've been taking online classes to become a better mographer, and now I'm wondering "What for?" If they guys who are at the top of the freelance field think its such a horrible place, why am I working so hard just to be at the bottom of it? Anyway this is something I've been struggling with for the past year and with 30 rapidly approaching, this post really got to me. Then I read your post and while I empathize with you (because god knows it sucks to be in the spot you're in) it was kinda nice to know that I'm not the only one. So I'm posting this because maybe it will help you to know that there are others who aren't "content with being hacks," but are having a tough time finding the avenues not to be. This thread will no doubt have an effect on my professional future, and as I move forward I'd love to hear how it has shaped your decisions (or anybody else's who feels they too are in the same boat). Also, I watched your reel and thought it was pretty good. So if you're a hack, what does that make me? Ugh! Anyways, sorry for unloading. I'm spent. Need a beer.
-j

P.S. - Congrats Harry! Glad you found something that will make you and your family happy. And though I've only spent a little time there, I would highly recommend PDX, amazing place. Try breakfast @ Junior's Cafe, trust me.

[brandj]

Harry, seriously congrats.
It sounds like you are making a great move and RGS is lucky to have you.
I truly appreciate your generosity and knowledge-sharing over the years. Truly awesome.

I showed my wife your letter and she said. "Wow, this sounds like you wrote it."
I only wish.

Best of luck!